The heart-mending comes in the form of two steps forward and one step back. Just when I think I am doing better, a trigger or memory levels me. Today was my first work day at home since Fred's passing. I was home by myself most of yesterday, but it wasn't the same ... wasn't as hard. Sole responsibility for his care was woven into my weekday routine. Today I longed for his wet nose and warm breath by my side as I worked. I felt lost not having him here to check on ... his bed to fluff.
But then there lay Phoebe and Garrett, sharing the sun-soaked loveseat, ironing out the terms of their newfound friendship.
And then there was the orb weaver spider that I discovered ... expertly weaving her web outside of the back door. (Spider is good medicine to me.)
And, last but not the least, the celebration of my daughter's arrival in this world 18 years ago today. Time to reflect on another anniversary of the pivotal transition from maiden to mother. The requirements of that role certainly change over time and yet at its core is always and in all ways love.
How can my hurting heart be anything but grateful?