Day 16,804 Gratitude

Every day I think about how I have fallen one day further behind in my 60 in 60 project. I won't lie. Each day a shouldness knot begins to loop and tug in my stomach. But then I breathe, remind myself that there's still plenty of time, and that I am always, always, always free to change the plan, change my mind ... anytime I choose. (You have that freedom, too, my friend.) Yes, even when a deal's a deal.

I am so grateful that I've given myself the gift of space and time to deeply grieve Fred's passing. He deserved it. I deserved it, too.

I am grateful that I've given myself the gift of space and time to deeply celebrate my birthday. The completion of another journey around the sun is worthy of it. I am worthy of it, too.

And I am grateful that I've given myself the gift of full engagement in this particular turn of the wheel of the year. There will be no wistful sighs, as in years past, over missing the the transition from summer to fall. I've been embracing it, wide awake and fully present. All of autumn's magic tricks of light, sound, and sensation have not been lost on me.

What are you feeling grateful right now?

Day 16,801: Birthday Gratitude

Bright blessings all around as I celebrate my 46th trip around the sun ...

The day started with coffee and scones with a dear friend at a neighborhood shop that has a way of stealing your heart. The wise fellow in the photo above (born through local artist, Michelle Blades) was a sweet gift and shall humbly serve as a precious totem to accompany me on this next leg of my journey. After breakfast, Amy and I were able to steal a walk on the forested trails of a local park. It's something that I always feel called to do on my birthday ... devote part of the day to nature and honor the festive decay around me as the confetti of my own rebirth.

The day kept getting better and better ...

Lunch with my husband in the Hofbrauhaus Bier Garden, just basking in the sunshine and Cincinnati Skyline. A half liter of 1810 Prince Ludwig may have been consumed. And then my favorite dinner was prepared with love at home that night ... chicken enchiladas and homemade cherry cheesecake.

Best wishes from friends and family flowed in throughout the day via phone calls, e-mails, texts, and Facebook. Constant reminders that above all else goes love.

My heart is brimming with gratitude ...

Day 16,798 Gratitude

Late yesterday afternoon, I finally coaxed myself into doing a little cleaning. I had pretty much done nothing since Fred's passing. There lingered a strange compulsion to stop time and keep everything as it was when he was there. But it was a bright autumn day and it felt like it was time to move forward. So as I wiped this, swept that, and went about putting odds and ends in their place, I was stopped cold in the dining room as I saw the scene below.


The setting sun is prone to shine through our front door and cast an image of itself upon the floor. Always enchanting, yes, but this was spectacularly different. The way that the rays of light were streaming in and dancing in ribbons upon the floor made me wonder if this might be an angelic visitation. Maybe Fred was letting me know that his journey across the Rainbow Bridge was complete and that he's not only okay but happy. My heart felt full.

About an hour later, with cleaning complete, I set about smudging with dried sage. I wanted the blessed smoke to dissolve and dissipate any lingering heaviness and sadness from all of those weeks of worrisome care-giving and vigil-holding. When all was said and done, this was how the light appeared.


Just as we see faces in random patterns and animal shapes in the clouds, I know that the light can play tricks on the eye and appear to be something it's not. But if there was any doubt an hour or so before, this sight sealed the deal. There are angels among us. Not always in the form that we may anticipate, but they show themselves in unique ways when we need them most. Maybe through something that a loved one says. Maybe through a song we hear on the radio as we drive to work. And maybe, just maybe, in the way that the light of the sun streams through a leaded glass window on an October day as we pick up the pieces after saying goodbye to a beloved friend.

And for this I am so grateful ...

Day 16,793 Gratitude

When I decided to wire-wrap 60 pendants in 60 days, I knew that I had about enough sterling silver wire in my inventory to cover the first ten pendants. This wire had been ordered many years ago, so I had completely fallen out of touch with the escalating price of silver. When I perused the six-month-old catalog to gather information to order wire for the next ten pendants, I was flabbergasted at the exponential increase. When I mustered the courage to finally enter the order into the system, I discovered that those prices had doubled from what had been published. For better or worse, I placed the order anyway because for me, a deal's a deal.

I'm now looking at this fresh delivery of new wire that costs 30 cents, 50 cents and close to 75 cents per inch. Most pendants will require anywhere from 1.5 feet to 3 feet of it. For a moment or two, I wondered if I'd shot myself in the foot ... with this order ... with this project. Wallowing ensured. But still. The heart of the matter never waivered. A deal's a deal.

Call me crazy, but I made a promise to wire-wrap 60 pendants, my entire crystal and gemstone inventory in the queue, within 60 days. Years before that promise, I vowed to use my knowledge and gifts to be of service. A mineralogical matchmaker, of sorts. Again, a deal's a deal.

I trust that those who need these pendants will not only find me and them, but also recognize the love that is poured into each one. Precious metals prices are what they are. Thus the price of the pendants will be what they will be. I will continue to show up and do my part. The rest I will put into hands much bigger than mine with faith that all is and will continue to be well.

For all of this and so much more, I am so grateful ...

Day 7 of 60: White Howlite -- SOLD

:: Click to learn more about 60 in 60 ::

White Howlite can be used to calm communication, facilitate awareness and encourage emotional expression. It combines the power of reasoning with observation and patience. It also encourages a sense of ambition to reach ones goals and, in the process, helps to eliminate hesitation when taking action is required. This is a nice stress reliever and is said to be especially good for supporting the 6th and 7th chakras. This is one of my oldest stones in my queue to be wrapped ... I brought it back from Sedona, Arizona in April 2005!

This pendant is lovingly hand-wrapped in sterling silver wire. It is about 1.75" in length and .75" wide and it has been charged with Reiki. Both sides are suitably embellished so that either can be worn as the front. It will include an 18" black satin cord necklace so that it is ready-to-wear and will be sent in a 2"x3" white box for gift-giving.

It is available for $12 plus $3 shipping via first-class mail, but if you "Like" the Magic Beans Workshop page on Facebook, shipping is free. E-mail me to purchase.

Day 6 of 60: Quartz Wand -- SOLD

:: Click to learn more about 60 in 60 ::

Quartz crystals can be used to amplify both body energy and thoughts. They can assist in the creation of power and can provide clarity of thinking. Whether the crystal is worn, carried or placed in ones environment, the force, warmth and brilliance remain attuned to the energy of the one to whom it is connected. This particular crystal is one of only a few that I purchased in Taos, New Mexico this year.

This pendant is lovingly hand-wrapped in sterling silver wire. It is about 2.25" in length and .25" wide and it has been charged with Reiki. It will include an 18" black satin cord necklace so that it is ready-to-wear and will be sent in a 2"x3" white box for gift-giving.

It is available for $19 plus $3 shipping via first-class mail, but if you "Like" the Magic Beans Workshop page on Facebook, shipping is free. E-mail me to purchase.

Day 16,791 Gratitude

The heart-mending comes in the form of two steps forward and one step back. Just when I think I am doing better, a trigger or memory levels me. Today was my first work day at home since Fred's passing. I was home by myself most of yesterday, but it wasn't the same ... wasn't as hard. Sole responsibility for his care was woven into my weekday routine. Today I longed for his wet nose and warm breath by my side as I worked. I felt lost not having him here to check on ... his bed to fluff.

But then there lay Phoebe and Garrett, sharing the sun-soaked loveseat, ironing out the terms of their newfound friendship.

And then there was the orb weaver spider that I discovered ... expertly weaving her web outside of the back door. (Spider is good medicine to me.)

And, last but not the least, the celebration of my daughter's arrival in this world 18 years ago today. Time to reflect on another anniversary of the pivotal transition from maiden to mother. The requirements of that role certainly change over time and yet at its core is always and in all ways love.

How can my hurting heart be anything but grateful?